Darryl increasingly feels like small group prayer time has turned into gossip time. Darryl doesn’t think anyone else in his group is discerning a problem with prayer time, but he is becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the way prayer requests are shared. It seems like the focus is on people’s dilemma and the presumed cause/effect of that dilemma rather than on God’s provision and intervention in the face of those dilemmas. Darryl knows it will be a touchy subject for the group if he brings it up. He also wonders if his perception about sharing prayer concerns is the correct one? After all, the group does seem to be passionate about prayer and spends a good portion of group time praying. Should he put his concern if front of the whole group, or should he confide in one or two trusted members of the group first?
What would you do if you were Darryl?
YOUR RESPONSES
Darryl should first pray about his feelings and seek God's guidance on the issue at hand. If he is still convicted about his feelings he should then speak to the small group leader and voice his concerns. This way the leader and Darryl can discuss the issue further and hopefully clarify the concerns. Darryl may be bringing something to light that the rest of the group may not be aware of.
George Vasquez, Journey Church San Antonio
In our small group prayer time, we ask "Are there urgent prayer needs (a death, someone in emergency room, etc)?" We then make it comfortable for someone not to pray aloud (say "If you feel led to pray tonight") and then we ask that the following person pray for their own burdens and pray for the needs of the person immediately preceeding them. The last person, usually the facilitator, prays for his/her own requests and prays for each of the members. I must confess, that when I am the last to pray, I am jotting down key words while others are praying so as not to leave anyone out.
We have found this gives us more prayer time and has eliminated "gossip". When we are speaking to the Lord, we tend to be a little more like Jesus and gossip a lot less!
(If the group is too large to do this, break the large group into smaller ones.)
We will also sometimes pass around a prayer request sheet and then make copies for each member to take home. When people are writing, they are usually in a hurry and leave out the "gossip". Also, seeing something in writing helps us see the important points and eliminate what is not necessary.
However, there are times when someone is hurting and needs to share what is on their heart. The facilitator needs to be able to discern when someone is gossiping and when the group needs to minister to that person by simply loving them enough to listen.
Pam
