Small Groups

In last month's issue of "Small Group Dynamics," I described what I see as a behemoth problem for small groups and small group ministries, especially in America. I believe this problem is an obstacle to real spiritual growth through groups. The problem is a lack of authentic community as compared to that of the prototype: the church of the New Testament.

Real Community: What Is It?

Actually, the primary problem is a misunderstanding of what real community is. Merriam Webster Dictionary defines Community as:

A unified body of individuals b : the people with common interests living in a particular area; broadly : the area itself. c : an interacting population of various kinds of individuals (as species) in a common location. d : a group of people with a common characteristic or interest living together within a larger society.

The word community, comes from the same word as commune: a place where people live together and share everything; communism: a theory which advocates a state of society in which there should be no private ownership, all property being vested in the community and labor organized for the common benefit of all members; and communion: an act or instance of intimate communication or sharing.

These definitions provide us with some prerequisites for authentic community: (1) proximity, (2) intimacy, (3) regular interaction, (4) sharing of things and life.

Community in the New Testament is defined best in Acts 2:42-47:

They joined with the other believers and devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and fellowship, sharing in the Lord's Supper and in prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together constantly and shared everything they had. They sold their possessions and shared the proceeds with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord's Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity— all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their group those who were being saved.

This passage, along with many others through the Book of Acts, as well as all of the "one another" passages throughout the New Testament, indicate a deep sense of unity, togetherness, and others-first living: authentic community.

Yet today in the church we often use the word community with far less intensity. Small group community is a once a week (if that) meeting where we study the Bible, pray for one another's prayer requests, and eat some snacks. That's not bad, but it's far less than authentic community! Larry Crabb describes a typical small group in The Safest Place on Earth: "We arrange our bodies in a circle, but our souls are sitting in straight-backed chairs facing away from the others." What an accurate and dreadful portrayal of many groups!

I like how the authors of Small Group Leaders' Handbook: The Next Generation describe this misunderstanding of the word community:

Overheard in a Community-less Small Group

1. "What was your name again?"
2. "Well, since no one has any prayer requests … "
3. "Did anyone meet with their one-on-one last week?"
4. "Well, since it looks like no one else is coming, let's just forget it for this week."
5. "I'm just here for the Bible study. I already have friends."

It's Time for a Change!

If small groups truly want to be transformational, they need to get back to the prototype — they need to get serious about authentic Biblical community. That will certainly mean big changes, not small ones, in the way we do small groups. I believe it will mean a paradigm change for most churches. It will require perhaps restructuring our small group ministries to be true places of community. It will demand the church lead the way in reinventing neighborhood in American culture.

Small groups in the West generally are formed somewhat homogeneously, by affinity, or by acquaintance. Unfortunately, forming groups this way does not necessarily provide those things that define authentic community: proximity, intimacy, regular interaction, sharing of things and life, unity.

In many American cities and suburbs, the neighborhood or subdivision is a natural place for this kind of authentic community to form. I believe people in these neighborhoods desire a sense of community (although they may not say it that way) in their busy and fragmented lives. The church has an incredible opportunity to transform lives by the power of the gospel right where we live!

My wife and I have seen the difference in "neighborhood groups" and the "normal" groups made up of people from all over town. The first group we were a part of in our married life was one that consisted of people in our apartment building, most of which were not yet Christians. We saw one another almost daily, we constantly shared things with our neighbors, we became very close to each other because of the time we had to spend together outside of "meetings." God brought spiritual transformation in that group like we have not seen in many of the other groups we have been a part of. Since that time, God has been developing in me, especially recently, a passion to see small groups on every block of our neighborhoods, impacting and reaching their neighbors with the life-changing message of the gospel.

A couple months ago I read Randy Frazee's book, The Connecting Church. Frazee develops the concept of neighborhood groups, what he calls "finding a common place" and the idea of rediscovering neighborhood. Wow! I believe that when God wants to get something done, he puts ideas in the minds and hearts of many people all at the same time. This has happened numerous times in the history of the church. Is He doing something now? (If you have not done so already, get Frazee's book and read it yourself. You can purchase it from the SmallGroups.com bookstore at http://smallgroups.com/bookstore

What Are Neighborhood Small Groups?

Neighborhood small groups are really a simple concept. Their aim is to connect a small group of people in a neighborhood or subdivision and provide a place where they can see and have contact with one another on nearly a daily basis. If someone wants to get together with someone else from the group — to ask for prayer, to help with a need, to encourage or to be spurred on, to confess a sin, to share a meal or a tool or a light bulb, whatever — all they have to do is walk across or down the street.

Here's a definition: Neighborhood Small Groups are small groups of 4-12 adults (or 2-6 families with children) from a particular neighborhood or subdivision. Participants live within walking distance from one another. Their purpose is to build authentic Biblical community, living out all the one another commands of the New Testament together, to team with God in reaching out through friendships to their unchurched neighbors, and to grow together into mature followers of Christ.

We are piloting several new Neighborhood Groups at Northeast Christian Church, where I serve as Pastor of Small Groups. We have about 70 existing adult small groups. We are not asking these groups to change to become Neighborhood Groups; however, our strategy of assimilating people into groups by areas (generally by zip codes) will enable us to move in that direction.

Why Neighborhood Small Groups?

• Building authentic Biblical community (the kind typified in the New Testament church) takes both planned and spontaneous time interacting together. It is much more than a two-hour meeting once a week.
• Building authentic Biblical community takes building interdependence among people — breaking down the typical independent lifestyles (I can do it on my own) of our culture. This happens best and most naturally among people who live in close proximity to one another.
• We need to redefine community from a Biblical perspective. As Frazee writes, "Living in Christian community is not all about comfort and convenience; it is all about hard work and sometimes sacrificial giving in order to fulfill the requirements of Christ's command to love one another. Community is about giving yourself entirely to Christ and to your neighbor."
• Neighborhood Small Groups fulfill Jesus' command to "Love your neighbor as yourself."
• Neighborhood Small Groups are one of the best methods for carrying out the church's mission: "go and make disciples of all nations … baptizing them … and teaching them."
• Our neighborhoods are our personal mission fields! They are the places where God has planted us to reap a harvest. As we look out into the neighborhoods where we live, we can see that the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. The workers could be facilitators and other Christian members of a small group who pray for and build friendships with their neighbors.
• Spiritual maturity happens best when people really connect, not just face to face, but also heart to heart and soul to soul. Many small groups are characterized more by casual camaraderie than authentic relationships. When people begin to spend more time with one another, especially spontaneously, they can more easily take off their masks, trust one another, and connect on a soul level. That does not happen in many current small groups where people only see one another for a couple hours once a week. Some groups see each other only every other week or even once a month! No wonder many small groups are bearing so little fruit in the way of spiritual growth!

Neighborhood Small Groups Implementation

1. Pilot several Neighborhood Small Groups.
2. Check with current groups to see if some are or could be Neighborhood Small Groups. Look at close-by apartment complexes for possibilities. (Apartment complexes are perfect for forming Neighborhood Small Groups.)
3. Current small groups should never be forced to become Neighborhood Small Groups. Rather, this will always be a choice. Do not break up current non-geographical relationships to form Neighborhood Small Groups.
4. As new facilitators are trained or as apprentices are prepared to be sent by their groups, give new facilitators an option of starting Neighborhood Small Groups. Our church small group department helps by providing a report by zip code of people who attend the church but are not currently in a small group. Facilitators can go through this report looking for people who live on streets in their neighborhoods. They can then call these people to get to know them, set up visits in their homes together, send out invitations to an initial get-together, etc.
5. As Pilot Neighborhood Small Groups begin to grow and bear fruit, seek to include testimonies from people with changed lives from these groups in weekend services, in your newsletter, and in other venues where people can respond.
6. Display a map of your region with pins placed for each small group. Neighborhood Small Groups will be one particular color, different than all the rest, to signify where they are located, and to show their growth over the months.

10 Steps for Planning & Forming a Neighborhood Small Group

Most of the following steps should be followed in numerical sequence. However, exceptions may occur that would necessitate following some of the steps out of this order. For instance, if your nucleus is 5 or 6 Christian couples, you may want to meet for a while and begin with the curriculum described in #10, and then, later, go back to #6 and plan to invite unchurched neighbors into the group. At that time it may be necessary to send some participants out of the original group to help form new nucleuses for new Neighborhood Small Groups.

1. Begin with prayer for God's purpose, power and provision. Even Jesus said, "For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do what I want" (John 6:38). He also said, "I do nothing on my own, but I speak what the Father taught me" (John 8:28). We have to start like Jesus and realize that we should do nothing on our own, but only what God is leading us to do. This small group will be His. He is the leader, and you are the human facilitator of all He wants to accomplish in and through the group.
2. Pray for your neighbors and for your neighborhood. Ask God to send you people to help you form the nucleus of your group and that your neighbors might be open to being a part of it. Walk through your neighborhood, praying as you pass homes for people in your neighborhood. If you already know about personal prayer needs, lift them up to God as you walk. (Of course, be discreet and discerning. You can pray "in secret" even as you walk down the street!)
3. Begin with a nucleus of people in your neighborhood from your church. These should all be people who live in close proximity to one another. Your church can provide a report by address of people who attend the church but are not currently in a small group. Go through this report looking for people who live on streets in your neighborhood. Call these people to get to know them, set up visits, send out invitations to an initial get-together, etc.
4. Meet together over dinner (a barbecue if the weather is right!) to share your plan for a Neighborhood Small Group. Spend some time just getting to know one another, if you don't already. See SmallGroups.com's Barrier Breakers for ideas.
5. With those who agree to be part of the nucleus of a Neighborhood Small Group, begin meeting weekly to start planning and praying together. (A nucleus can be 2 families up to 5 or 6 families.) Begin with a meal together, and then meet to plan and pray together. This may become your regular group meeting time. Times to meet include weekday evenings and Sunday afternoons, but other times may work better for your group.
6. Get the nucleus involved with you in steps 1 and 2, above. Pray together for your neighbors. Prayer walk together through your neighborhood.
7. Plan some neighborhood get-togethers: block parties, barbecues, game nights, subdivision yard sales, car washes, etc. These events are simply a way to get to know more of your neighbors and begin to form more community in your neighborhood.
8. Get to know unchurched or underchurched neighbors personally. Encourage individuals and families in your nucleus to build friendships with neighbors in their own homes, yards and streets.
9. (The process from number 5 to this step could take weeks or months. The timing has to be left to God rather than a preset agenda or plan.) Begin planning a brief (6-8 week) topical study to which you can invite your neighbors. Knowing your neighbors interests and real needs is critical here! Invite them to participate in a discussion group of others studying this particular topic for a defined number of weeks. Do not invite them to something that sounds like it may never end. You can "re-up" after the end of this first series. Here is a list of possible studies you could start with:

• Interactions: Marriage (6 sessions), by Bill Hybels
• Interactions: Parenthood (6 sessions), by Bill Hybels
• Interactions: Jesus (6 sessions), by Bill Hybels
• Interactions: Essential Christianity (6 sessions), by Bill Hybels
• Bible 101: Foundations: How we got our Bible (6 sessions), by Bill Donahue
• Bible 101: Foundations: Getting the Bible's Big Picture (6 sessions), by Bill Donahue
• Christ & Islam: Understanding the Faith of the Muslims (6 sessions), by James A. Beverley
• Discipleship Journal Bible Study: Beating Busyness (8 sessions), by Adam R. Holz
• Pilgrimage Growth Guide: Mastering Money (8 sessions), by Dudley Delffs

10. When you finish this series, take a week off. The following week meet to share a meal and invite participants to re-up for the next series and to be a regular participant in this Neighborhood Small Group. Share the purpose and plans for the small group with them. Plan your next series. Use a guide that will help form your group and begin to form life-changing community.