Life in a fallen world in no picnic. Trials and stresses threaten to overwhelm us. People are often critical and harsh. The result is that Christians—and, yes, even Christian leaders—can (and do!) lose heart.
The word for this all-too-common malady is discouragement. Look it up in the dictionary and you'll see it means, literally, "to be without courage." From experience we each know what that's like … it's that gloomy loss of confidence that a negative situation will even improve, much less turn completely around. Being discouraged feels like a punch in the gut—long-term. It deflates us, steals our joy, and robs us of the resolve to press ahead. Worst of all, discouragement can strike anytime and anywhere, in a thousand different ways: Marital woes. Financial stress. Medical concerns. Family troubles. Job pressures. Church conflict. Deep-seated, unresolved life issues. Spiritual dryness.
As those who have been given the charge to care for the souls of others—whether a group of leaders, an apprentice, or a whole small group, we need to know that God has given us a wonderful weapon called ENcouragement to fight the pernicious, pervasive enemy of DIScouragement.
Here are four "encouraging truths" to tuck away:
1. Encouragement is far more substantive and difficult than most people think.
Encouragement (as the Bible describes it) is more than just friendly pats on the back, warm smiles, and superficial compliments.
The most common NT word for encouragement means literally "to call alongside." It's the idea of sidling up next to someone who is hurting—and getting personally involved. Depending on the situation encouragement can take a variety of forms. It can mean to comfort and console (Acts 16:39; 1 Cor. 4:13) or to cheer up someone who's grieving or down (2 Cor. 1:4; 7:6; 1 Thess. 3:2).
It can mean to strengthen one who's weak and faltering (like a stadium of screaming fans who believe in their team and stand behind them when the chips are down and somehow will them to victory).
It can also have the sense of imploring (2 Corinthians 12:18; Philemon 9) or exhorting toward obedience and faithfulness to God (Acts 14:22; Rom. 12:1, 1 Pet. 5:1).
In short, encouragement is comfort for the hurting. It's strength for the weak. It's a challenge for the wavering. And not from a distance. But from alongside. Encouragement doesn't scold from a distance, "Hey, you slacker. Get moving!" It doesn't engage in "drive-by clichés"—"Hey, just remember, 'Hang in there for Him: He hung up there for you!'"
No! True encouragement comes alongside and puts its arm around slumping shoulders and says, "Come on. Let's go together. I know this is tough, but I'll walk with you. We will get through this."
In the words of Larry Crabb, "Encouragement … is the kind of expression that helps someone want to be a better Christian, even when life is rough." (Encouragement: The Key to Caring, p. 9)
That's a profound reminder: The goal of biblical encouragement is not, ultimately, to help people feel better, or to give them warm thoughts. The idea is to spur them on to know God more deeply, to see them make real spiritual progress.
So … if to be discouraged is to be depleted of courage and hope, then to encourage is to fill with courage and hope.
2. Encouragement is a major job description of believers.
While the so-called "gift passages" (Rom. 12, 1 Cor. 12, and Eph. 4) speak of certain Christians possessing an extra-special God-given ability to encourage, other passages like 1 Thess. 5:11, Heb. 3:13, and Heb. 10:23-25 indicate encouragement is the responsibility of all believers. It's something we do to and for "one another." There are no age limits and no professional degrees are required.
Interested in a simple, life-changing exercise? Study the life of the New Testament character named Joseph (first introduced in Acts 4). This man gained the nickname Barnabas (which means literally, "Son of Encouragement"). Why? Because he never failed to build others up. People always came away from their time with him stronger and more determined and more hopeful than they were before. Who wouldn't want an impact and a legacy like that?
Someone has counted some 40 references to encouragement in the 27 books of the New Testament.
The point is that when the church gathers in large or small group settings or when spiritual siblings get together one-on-one, discouraged people ought to come away with their spiritual tanks filled: new perspective and fresh resolve, and a renewed motivation to live for Christ.
3. Encouragement comes in a variety of forms.
If you scan the Bible or think back over your life, you'll realize there's no single right way to encourage others. In fact, depending on your gifts, background, personality, you've probably have your own unique way of encouraging others.
Again the prerequisite is being observant. Watch. Keep in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5). And when a situation surfaces, and when you sense the moment is right, sidle up next to a hurting soul and …
Be present. This is the gift of yourself. Ask questions and then just listen. Be "all there." Let people vent without the need to try to fix or explain the mysterious ways of God.
Believe in him/her. This is that encouraging ministry of being an advocate for failures (as Barnabas was) and coming alongside those who have blown it.
Speak encouraging words. Proverbs talks about the power of words. "Death and life are in the power of the tongue" (18:21). What opportunity! What danger! We can build up (words of life) or tear down (words of death). With our words we can also remind others of the truth (but again sensitivity is so crucial).
Write a note. Perhaps you are gifted at expressing encouragement through notes, cards, emails, and letters.
Remember. Names, anniversaries (especially "hard" anniversaries).
Touch. Hugging isn't everybody's bag, but some people have a gift for just wrapping their arms around you, absorbing your hurt, and imparting their concern and strength.
Show hospitality. This is that wonderful ability to throw open your home and have people in. It doesn't matter if your home is fancy or the meal is elaborate, so long as people feel accepted and cared for and loved on.
Give. Some have the temperament and the means to help those with financial and material needs. What a great ministry! And what an encouragement!
Help. Some aren't good at writing letters or hugging. But they are good at serving. If this is you, roll up your sleeves and mow a yard or cook a meal or watch some kids. God can do wonders through those who serve.
4. The Bible is full of discouraged people … who found encouragement.
Scripture contains numerous snapshots of "low" people, expressing all kinds of raw and honest feelings of disillusionment, going through all sorts of disturbing and disheartening times.
The point is simply that if you are limping today, please don't feel your situation is hopeless. It is not. The Bible is a big, thick record of God's faithfulness through the ages.
And if you're not discouraged today, then be aware that someone in your circle of influence is. It's a sobering reality. But the good news is that what God has done before, God can do again.
Let's take up the amazing, divine weapon called ENcouragement and use it today to fight the devilish plague of DIScouragement.
