When Allen first met Steve, they were in high school gym together. Steve was quiet and insecure, with few friends. Then Allen began to include Steve in his social life. At first their mutual love for partying drew them together. But as Allen started to grow spiritually, he lost interest in drinking and wild parties. In college, they drifted apart.
When Allen reconnected with Steve after college, Steve's life was a mess. He was drinking heavily and was addicted to sexually graphic literature. Allen stepped in to help. With few resources of his own and a new wife to attend to, Allen drove Steve out of state to a rehab center.
Months passed and Steve continued to struggle with sin, but slowly Allen got through to him. He helped Steve establish a fully committed relationship with Christ and stuck with him through years of ups and downs. Steve often called Allen when desperate to return to his old life. Patiently, Allen continued to give his friend time and energy.
Today Steve is free from his addictive behaviors and growing stronger in Christ. Allen's commitment to love Steve, despite his persistent sin, has been worth the effort.
A common instruction in Christian circles is "Hate the sin but love the sinner." This is easier said than done. It's difficult to treat someone with robust and compassionate love while hating something they habitually do. More often we tepidly tolerate someone whose behavior repels us, or we ignore the harmful behavior of someone we love.
We may be coolly civil to our immoral neighbor, but is that what Jesus would call love? And what about ignoring a Christian friend's compulsive shopping or explosive temper—is that love?
Loving sinners is messy. Easy answers often elude us. Trouble is, we're all sinners, so if we're going to be the family of God together, we're going have to confront sin.
The first step is to recognize the sin in your own life. Consider journaling about how God has loved you despite your sin. Write some of your most recent sins, and express gratitude for God's forgiveness. He doesn't condone your faults, but he offers you forgiveness and a chance to become who you were meant to be.
Then tell a spiritual partner. Tell him or her about the sin you wrote about. Ask your partner to support you in prayer about this issue. This may be a scary step, but if your partner is trustworthy, telling someone about your struggle will launch you out of the cycle of sin-and-remorse.
And if you get a call like this from your partner, look to Jesus' example.
